Due to a shipping error, thousands of hippos are required to take the Doctorcratic oath.
Archive for January, 2009
Pun! #2
January 31, 2009Love
January 31, 2009Love is when you feed your cat enough days in a row that she sleeps right next to you for the entirety of your four-hour nap.
Pun!
January 30, 2009In the interest of preserving my Legendary Wit on the uneraseable internet, I give you a joke:
What does the pope eat on his pancakes?
Hmm?
Papal syrup!
Birthday Tweet
January 30, 2009It is not my birthday, but tweet number 1,021. That is, tweet ten twenty-one, the month and day of my birthday. No one was online for me to show this to, so I decided I’d blog it and save it FOREVER. And now you know.
How to Justify Morning Beer
January 30, 2009If it’s before noon, it is socially acceptable to drink Screwdrivers, Mimosas, or Bloody Marys.
Bloody Marys traditionally have beer backs.
So, you can drink a Bloody Mary with a beer back, hold the Bloody Mary.
My First Overheard
January 30, 2009I have finally been close enough to a computer after hearing something completely inane to be able contribute to the online compendium of local idiocy: Overheard in Minneapolis.
Behold!
Woman #1: Are you done for the day?
Woman #2: Yeah. Now I get to go to the store to by some fleece for kitty hats.
Woman #1: Yay! Kitties! Meow!
This is made even better by the editors, who linked to this XKCD comic in the subject line.
Trivia!
January 26, 2009Yes, this is week three. I’m starting to think you guys don’t really care to answer these questions, but we’ll see! (Answers to last week’s thingy here.) This week’s list looks like this:
1. What’s the name of the guy who invented Facebook? Mark Zuckerberg (Cameron)
2. On what Pixies album will you find the song “Where is my mind?” Surfer Rosa (Kaeti)
3. According to Brad Neely, what are the three different heights of George Washington? 6′10, 6′20, 12 stories tall (made of radiation) (Cameron)
4. How many miles between here and Boston? (within, say, 50) 1402 (according to the Atlas I used when I drove back and forth) Given answer: 1390 (Cameron)
5. Two major figures in the Star Trek world have died in the past month. Who were they, and what were their respective connections to Star Trek? (Partial credit for partial answers) RRicardo Montalbán (KHAAAN) (Cameron)
6. A pirate walks into a bar with a steeringwheel sticking out of his pants. The bartender says, “You know, you have a steeringwheel sticking out of your pants.” What does the pirate say? “Yarrr! It’s drivin’ me nuts!” (Le)
8 Boxes
January 23, 2009Recently, I moved to a house in Uptown, just half a block out of the four-square block area called LynLake. I am two blocks from Pizza Lucé, half a block from an amazing-looking coffee shop (such charm can be seen from outside!), maybe four blocks from the VFW/Herkimer/everything else at the intersection of Lyndale and Lake, and a few more blocks away from Calhoun Square. Not to mention all my friends who live within four or five blocks.
Yeah, it’s all great. But the moving process has revealed a truth about me: I love books and movies. (Music too, but you’ll see why that was not physically demonstrated in the move.) When I packed up my books and DVDs, they took up eight boxes. And not small boxes. Look:
Sure, some boxes are smaller than others, but that’s an ass-ton of boxes. And books are heavy.
I am excited to unpack these boxes and organize my books and DVDs. I may let you know how it goes.
I find this all very interesting. You may not. But I don’t care, because this is my internet.
#1!
January 22, 2009I’m not sure how this happened, but I am the #1 result when you Google creepy old man wink (not in quotes). I have secured my rightful place at the top of the creepy/pervy old man hierarchy. *haaaaaaawink*
What I Saw On TV Today
January 21, 2009I was watching MSNBC and they were doing a teaser for a story coming after the commercial break, going on and on about the dress Michelle Obama was wearing for the inaugural ball. They were all, “Oh, is she the new fashion leader? Move over Paris and Milan!” For about two whole minutes! They also managed to suggest that the Obama children were also fashion leaders (?). Then, without any segue or other transition, they went to commercial by saying “This is MSNBC, the place for politics.”
